I am only Human

Dear Diary,

Social media let's us hide so many truths, so many demons and broken parts of us. Don't let the pretty pictures fool you, we're all human and we all break at times.

I have been struggling so much recently from sadness. I keep it bottled up because I never want to lose the charm, the ability to give joy to others. I can turn it on and let it radiate. Yet at night I can lay awake crying from the feelings of loneliness.

Now a days it's so hard to know who really cares and who is just "faking" it. I can't seem to connect, to find something deeper than surface level with women around me. It's so difficult to filter through bullshit smiles and half ass conversations.

photo by Brooke Tucker Photography

I am so fragile it seems. Words hurt, opinions matter and the lack of deep meaningful friendships can most definitely leave a void. Social media can make you feel like you have thousands of friends, but at the end of the day, one real friend beats all the followers in the world.

We were never designed to do life electronically, we are not robots. We were designed by a loving God, with hearts and minds, for the intent of being connected on a deeper level.

Sometimes the fear of not being good enough, or letting others down from what they think they know of Me, causes me to become so socially awkward. When did I become so void?

I am alone. I am only human and I need something more.

#sociallyawkward #happiness #depression #socialmedia #sadness